I gotta go my own way..alone

I can only watch when you guys play..not that i hate you or what..it's like i don't fit to participate in.I can only go one side and practice myself..alone..without anybody.Sometimes when you ask me to join in,i'll only say no..coz..it's like i'm the odd one(if you get what i mean).I know that some of you will be there teaching me if i don't understand things but i don't want to..fight or trying to get skills from you guys or something like that..it's like i'll use all those i've learn from you and fight with you just to get a place..i don't want stuff to be like that..really..that's why i rather practice myself knowing this comes from all my hard work..i don't wanna lose our friendship..i hope you understand..we both loves basketball and i don't want to compete with you.. i don't want stuff to be like that..Anyway,thanks for everything and sometimes..i hope you will understand and let me to do stuff my own way..thanks..